halo,你还记得我吗?我是那个认识你差不多六年的女生。那个一直喜欢着你的女生。那个一直在暗示你‘我喜欢你’的那个女生。那个一直在做无聊事情为了让你知道我的存在的女生。那个脸皮很薄却一直缠着你的女生。我们都有两个月没见面了,你应该忘记我了吧。
我们没见面的这两个月里,我想了很多事情,关于我们两人的事情。原来我们一直活在一个不明不白的关系里。说我们是朋友,但又不见得那么简单;说我们是恋人,但又说不上是;说我们是暧昧,也显得有点肤浅。我也不知道我们到底是什么?也许在我们的生活圈子里,我们什么都不是,只是一个不那么了解对方但比较熟悉的陌生人。
我常在想也许是因为你我也喜欢上晚上,感觉上晚上就是我们的空间。大概是我们大多见面的时间都是在晚上吧,想回去我们早上真的没见过面。有点荒唐的说。不知道我们会不会有机会在早上见面呢?
有时我在想是不是如我姐妹说,我对你太好而让你觉得我不重要?我不能确认你对我的感觉,但我能确定我对你的感觉。我喜欢你也许是因为我所谓的第一次吧,可能你会觉得没什么。
你是第一个我很喜欢的男生,我对你也说得上爱吧。第一个不管见几多次面都会很紧张的男生。第一个时常暗示你‘我爱你’的男生。第一个时常和我出夜街的男生。第一个独自去男生家的男生。第一个拴着我的男生。第一个抱我的男生。第一个独自上男生车的男生。第一个牵我手的男生。第一个十指紧扣的男生。第一个独自和男生一起看戏的男生。也是第一个吻我的男生。
你知道吗。第一次和你一起看戏我真的真的很紧张,我真的不知道要怎么打扮自己,不知道要怎么把自己的紧张情绪沉淀下来。真的超紧张的。跟没想到的是我们第一次看戏就坐 couple seat。真的好开心。还记得跟你看戏的戏票我还藏的很好,保存得很好。其实我到现在还不知道那戏到底在做什么,但就是很开心。也许是因为那时我在考试期特别紧张刚好你也带我出去放松吧。也许是不关事而是人的关系吧。那是我们第一次看戏,也许也是我们的最后一次了。
你知道吗。你最吸引我的地方是你的眼睛,虽然你的眼睛不是很大但就是很吸引我。还记得有一次你载我的时候,我在旁边默默地看着你,那个感觉真的很舒服,结果被你发现了。你说,‘你可以不要用那强奸的眼神看我吗?’你这句话真的把我笑惨了。:D
你知道吗。我每一年的生日都好想要一份你送我的礼物,而不止是一个祝福。我想要的礼物不贵,那个礼物也不难送,但对我却觉得很特别。我只想要你一个紧紧的拥抱。有好几次我都想告诉你但就是不敢。
我想告诉你其实我们一开始认识我就对你很有感觉了只是最近不知道怎么你已经变了我生活里的一小部分了。刚认识的我们只用电话联络,那时候其实很想跟你开始,只是我想得太多所以都一直没给你什么回应。后来的我们就变陌生人了,变得很少联络,甚至我们有一年多没联络了。但几年前我们又走的满密的,我们这忽冷忽热关系真的不知道可以持续多久?
跟你在一起真的很开心,真的很幸福,真的让我很想停在那一刻。真的真的很谢谢的给我的这一切,这一切一切真的让我很难忘。既然是那么的难忘,我也不逼自己忘记了,把它变成一个美丽的回忆也许对我会比较好吧。
Monday, 16 July 2012
Sunday, 1 July 2012
you again
Yesterday after i back home and wanna take a nap, but can't asleep so i read back our conversation.When i read back, i feel very relax everything that unhappy i forget at the moment. Our conversation kinda sweet, kinda warm and kinda funny.
When you sms me you always call me dear, babe or lovely. I like you call me by this name, it make me feel sweet, warm and happiness. But when we go out we just call each other 'ei'. Yup!!!just 'ei'... no dear, no babe, no lovely even name also no. FUNNY, RIGHT?
When i read to the top, i discover a part of message is lost. WTH...!!! WHY? emo again.. maybe is the memory full so lost a part. i try to save all the conversation with him in my laptop but i don't know how to move..stupid idiot!!! so what i can do is just delete the conversation that not important to me.
I just can say i am an idiot. Carelessly i delete the conversation with him...how sad :'( maybe this is the first step to forget him. Why phone don't like laptop!!! Got recycle bin can install back the thing that wrong delete.
Today is 30th of June the last day of June, another 30 minutes is 1st of July the first day of July. I miss you again. I wanna spend with you, it meaningful. Just by my own feeling.
I wanna date you movie together tonight. Not i'm no dare to date you is because i don't like your reply. Everytime when i date you, you always ask who else. Why you want ask who else!!! just you and me can't, isn't! DAMN YOU!
When you sms me you always call me dear, babe or lovely. I like you call me by this name, it make me feel sweet, warm and happiness. But when we go out we just call each other 'ei'. Yup!!!just 'ei'... no dear, no babe, no lovely even name also no. FUNNY, RIGHT?
When i read to the top, i discover a part of message is lost. WTH...!!! WHY? emo again.. maybe is the memory full so lost a part. i try to save all the conversation with him in my laptop but i don't know how to move..stupid idiot!!! so what i can do is just delete the conversation that not important to me.
I just can say i am an idiot. Carelessly i delete the conversation with him...how sad :'( maybe this is the first step to forget him. Why phone don't like laptop!!! Got recycle bin can install back the thing that wrong delete.
Today is 30th of June the last day of June, another 30 minutes is 1st of July the first day of July. I miss you again. I wanna spend with you, it meaningful. Just by my own feeling.
I wanna date you movie together tonight. Not i'm no dare to date you is because i don't like your reply. Everytime when i date you, you always ask who else. Why you want ask who else!!! just you and me can't, isn't! DAMN YOU!
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